At long last a long anticipated journey to see my beloved cousin Lady Georgiana Sully for a week has come upon me and I admit I can hardly contain myself. I have so longed to see her and so dearly missed her, it has quite near broken my heart.
I hate to travel but the rewards for the end of this journey will be completely worth the trials. I suspect I shall have much to write on whilst I am there; if I am lucky enough to find time to do it.
She has promised to introduce me to quite a large number of her acquaintance and I am quite intimidated by the notion..But I am in her good caring hands and I know she will not expose me to company not worth keeping.
I hope Mr. Hegwood can bear to have Mrs. Hegwood solely to himself, I will not scruple in confessing glad to be rid of her for some time. Lady Sulley will be graciously taking on some of the planning for my wedding clothes and her taste is certainly more to mine than anyone else aside from my dear Mrs. Cooper or Ms. Tattman.
To marry for love is something so rare and uncommon in most
lives that I must remember to cherish every moment I have for my fortune.Not a day has gone by since that blessed
moment last September when, before all of our acquaintance and beloved friends I
was made by the dearest of men the happiest of women on earth.When I find that I miss my Doctor (oh to at
last call him MY Doctor) so very intensely I must but remember the beautiful
day and find that I am happy, and I shall weather all the storms of matrimony,
and will indeed endure the agonizing wait I must face before our joyous day can
come, and I must endeavor to forget the tens of thousands of miles that
separate us whilst he is at sea, and the many dangers that could befall
him.How can one be so happy, yet be so
sad and fretful?
Mrs. Hegwood had, at the beginning before truly
understanding the length in which our engagement must extend, made a very good
stab at keeping my utterly distracted and unable to miss him fully, for week
after week trying ventures into town to look at warehouses and to explore the
latest plates and fashions from London and even France were undertaken, and
vast amounts of money were spent and then reimbursed when purchases without my
consultation were made and it disagrees wholly with my tastes.I confess this happened more frequently than
I like to admit, and she has begun to make an enemy with the establishments
where this practice was one too many times repeated.I have finally convinced her that eight
months was plenty of time in which to find clothes, have my garments made to my
perfect taste, and to decide on and complete any other task.
But a couple nights ago, I had the most peculiar dream.I attended a ball with my dearest and nearly
all I knew and loved were there but some were in the most peculiar dress.Some ladies and gentlemen were wearing things
from my mother’s youth and some were wearing things I could not even
comprehend.My beloved Eliza Tattman was
wearing the most absurd thing I had ever seen, but of course looked fetching
regardless.I doubt there is a thing she
could wear she did not look well in. At one point I can recall plain as day I danced with Mr. and Mrs. Tumbusch's dog! I do recall also that the gown in which I was wearing was a splendid display of fashion, and I have taken the time to sketch it down to make for my wedding Ball. I
suspect the quantity of wine I had with supper was perhaps excessive and my odd
dream was owing to it.I do so long to
dance again with my Doctor; he always was an exceptionally fine dancer, even if
he claims he will always spend his evening in the corner with the old women and
the card players.
I wish we could finally enter into fine weather again.I had but a fleeting taste a couple of week
past, and I gloried in ever sun beam I could find in my music room, and I could
have sworn my mood much improved.However, it was not to last and the cold weather once again returned
with a vengeance and quite often a hard freeze with rain that froze upon every
surface almost instantly after it landed.Mr. Hegwood was worried for the trees near the house lest branches break
and cause damage to the house or stables.With luck, we avoided any such
fate but I was confident I would freeze solid before it was all through.
Spring, they say, is just about the corner, and will be upon
us in no time.Perhaps with the return
of fine weather I can expect the return of my beloved.His portrait does nothing to stave away the loneliness
and despondency of his absence.
